AI Shimmies and Slides
Not sure how to explain my title there. But it's alliterative, and that's really all I required of it.
In a way, this week wasn't fair for Kris and Danny. On the other hand, given that Allison and Adam were *expected* to do well, maybe the expectations were unfair for them.
On the other hand, Adam and Allison both really did their thing. Danny and Kris...not so much.
Actually, Kris did a nice job. Danny didn't exactly stink up the place, but that last note was some kind of horrible.
More than anything, I must register my complaint that another year has gone by and nobody sang Scorpions!!! Oh, I know there's still time this season, but Danny should've gone with "I Can't Explain". That would've rocked (plus it's got the Klingon Death Scream in it, too).
I'll go with Kris and Allison in the Bottom Two. The tight-panted one is probably safe, as is Mr. Angry Eyes.
AI (very) Briefs
Danny awesome.
Allison very good.
Adam Adam.
Kris good but forgettable.
Matt good with a spritz of bad.
No one left for me to pick on. Bummer. No clue how the voting will go.
Groovy AI Thoughts
Disco night is always fun, although I don't remember one with this much variety before. It seems like most years we pretty much get a bunch of copycat stuff. Not so this year.
Unfortunately, Lil watched the previous seasons and treated us to a very lame version of "I'm Every Woman." I actually wondered if she was the lead-singer on the performance. Yawn.
Kris righted the ship and then some with a very cool take on "She Works Hard for the Money." He pretty much could've done any song with that arrangement and the cool percussion and it would've worked. I actually felt bad for Lil after Kris showed her up so badly.
Danny came close to taking a step backward, not doing much with the arrangement of "September," but doing his usual stellar job on the actual singing. Still, he clearly didn't measure up to Kris's originality.
Allison did her usual rock thing on "Hot Stuff," and it was actually pretty good. Not your typical Boogie Week stuff, anyway.
Matt committed the classic blunder of going up against a Sicilian when death is on the line...Hahahahahaha!!! Sorry, Princess Bride reference. Be very ashamed if I had to tell you that. Anyway, he took on a song ("Stayin' Alive") without much creative wiggle-room. Yes, he brought some funk to it, and it was okay, but I refer the reader back to Kris, who also chose a non-wiggly song and wiggled the ever-living-stuffing out of it.
Adam went for surprising with "Ashamed I Can't Remember the Name of the Song and I'm Not Turning the Toob Back On Just to Find It." I think he still went for a bit too much on a couple of the high notes. Not that he messed them up or anything, but I still think less is more with the glass-shattering stuff. Still, he's really good. (Although I wonder if anyone will actually want to buy his stuff. See him in person maybe, but recorded? Dunno).
Anoop happened. And he looked as pleased with it as I was. How pleased can you be with a very Drug Store version of "Dim All The Lights?" He actually looked disgusted at the end.
Paula, or at least a representative of her viscera, tells me that Danny and Adam will be in the Finals, but there's no WAY Danny outlasts Kris if America has anything resembling brains. But we lose two this week, and Anoop and Lil are made for the twin spots on the Buh-Bye-Mobile. Of course, Vote For the Worst has Lil tagged, so maybe we'll lose Allison instead.
This is as detailed I could get while spending less than fifteen minutes writing it. There, I'm admitting that I'm mailing it in. It's the least I can do. Really it is.
Late AI Thoughts
Okay, now that I've filed the taxes, I can give some quick thoughts on tonight's American Idol.
I'll be brief with my thoughts on the singers, but allow me to ask, "How did Quentin Tarantino became a vocal coach?" I mean, yes, he was a very good judge a few years ago. But coaching the vocalists? I guess the movie theme was a big part of it.
Now, to the performances.
Allison - "Don't Want to Miss a Thing" - I really wish she'd taken an actual song by an actual female, because it felt like she was held down by the low (for a girl) key. And I agree with The Fair Elaine that she tried to do too much with it.
Anoop - "I Do It For You" - Very nicely done. I liked that he made it his own but didn't go for too much.
Adam - "Born to be Wild" - Well, Adam did what Adam does, and he did it well.
Danny - "Endless Love" - I guess I understand that the song had meaning to him, but is that really the best reason to choose a song? Or maybe should he have gone for something he could really do *well*?
Matt - "Have You Ever Really Loved A Woman?" - I really don't have much to say here. It wasn't awful, and it wasn't terrific. Somebody else jump in here.
Kris - "Falling Slowly" - Kudos for picking a great song from a terrific movie. And singing it rather well. I actually wanted him to go on a little longer, but we have to allow the judges to talk, I suppose...
Lil - "The Rose" - I guess I should mention that she sang fairly well. But, as Mr. Tarantino said a few years ago, "I don't care." I'm still not sure why she made the Finals.
Bottom Three: Matt, Lil, Allison. I really hope Lil goes home.
AI Full Recap: Choices, Choices
Back by popular demand is my full (and snarky) recap of last night's American Idol festivities. The singing parts, anyway.
So this week, the AI Finalists got to choose a song, any song, from the years of their births. That's a lot of songs. And yet it was fairly hit and miss. How do you look at a year's worth of songs and end up with a lousy choice? I don't get it.
Danny was up first, and he took on "Stand By Me," albeit in a different arrangement than the typical. A solid performance, I suppose, although it ended up looking a bit better than I think it really was. After some of the other performances, that is.
Kris went with “All She Wants to Do is Dance.” Okay. Love Kris, but this wasn't a very good song choice. I actually like the song, and his arrangement was kinda cool, but it didn't do anything like show him off. Contestants need to learn to Not. Pick. Repetitious. Songs. Duh!
Lil allowed me to continue wondering how she made the Finals, going with "What's Love Got to Do With It?" Is it possible to do such an iconic song without coming across as Karaoke? Well, maybe, but Lil didn't manage it. Again, she's still just Generic R&B Singer to me. I suppose she's got a decent voice, but she's not really much of a performer. Unless you call her knock-off-nightclub-imitation of Tina a performance.
Anoop tried to bounce back from his hopeless attempt at Usher by singing "True Colors" and doing it brilliantly. Now, I wasn't completely blown away by the vocal or anything, but his R&B riffs actually worked on something stripped down. Can he do something up-tempo? I still remain steptipul (it's my blog and I'll type how I want to).
Scott decided, inadvisedly, to get out from behind the piano for "The Search is Over," which is one of those songs I can't help but love. It's from the days when Survivor was a band and not a TV Show!!! Unfortunately, I think the song would've worked better unplugged, maybe from the (drum roll) piano. As it was, it was Some Kind of Horrible. The phrasing was rough, the money notes were anything but, and I'm just so hoping Scott takes the train (see, cuz he mentioned he loved trains). And has anybody else noticed how rectangular his mouth is? I think it affects his diction.
Allison went with a Kimberly Locke song (okay, Bonnie Raitt). "I Can’t Make You Love Me” was a terrific choice, and I thought she sang it perfectly. I could've done without a few of the Rocker-Facial-Expressions-And-Microphone-Affectations, but the vocals were right in there. She's fortunate to have a voice that sounds different even when singing the same arrangement as the original. Which is why she's better than Lil. That, and she has better range. And better tone. And better control. Actually, she's better in all regards. America? Please agree...
Matt got back to some R&B, going with "Part Time Lover." On the positive side, it was way better than Chicken Little's attempt at the same. And actually, the unplugged portion of it I liked a great deal. His high notes on "feeling so right" were awesome. And then the music started. Sigh. It was basically a Bad Case of the Runs. Not a complete train wreck, but it was just a bit breathless. He hit so briefly on the notes before riffing of in different directions that it made the hits seem like misses. Does that even make sense? (Heh...I just thought of the Brawndo commercials. "And you'll probably turn invisible, which doesn't even make any sense." Yes, and now you're going to have to Google "Brawndo". You know you're going to...)
Unfortunately, Fox can't keep the show on schedule (maybe trim by three judges or so?), so we missed Adam. Fortunately, we have the Interwebs, so we saw him online. And what a terrific song choice he made, with "Mad World." I thought he maybe overstepped a bit at the very end, not quite getting on the final note and just barely sliding up to it by the time he had to stop. But very nice otherwise. I have to say though, that Adam's obscene range is getting a tad predictable. It's like listening to Mariah Carey back in the 90's. You knew the song was almost over when she started calling out to the neighborhood cats. But it almost became schtick. I think Adam needs to mix in a performance where he stays in the normal 20Hz-20kHz Human Hearing Range. We know he's got the money note in there. We just don't need it every week.
My faves were the A's. Adam, Allison, and Anoop. Danny was okay, but everybody else I could take or leave. Hopefully we'll have Lil and Scott as the Bottom Two, but I suspect America still thinks Lil is actually good, and Matt's proven to not be overly popular. And maybe Anoop lost some fans last week with his petulence. Or maybe Kris slips down after being rather forgettable. I'll go with Matt, Scott, and Kris for the Bottom Three. Hopefully Scott leaves, but I'm going to predict Matt instead.
Next week, maybe I'll be back to copping out with one-liners.
AI quick hits
Loved: Kris
Liked: Adam, Danny
Tolerated: Scott (actually edged toward "Liked"), Matt, Allison (also on the border)
Endured: Lil, Noop
Barely Kept My Dinner Down: Megan
I'm gonna say that Matt gets a bump from his fans and is safe. I just have to believe that Megan's in the Three of Shame, as is Anoop. And I'm putting Lil there, too, because I'm just not a fan.
Thoughts? I'm expecting a comment from Alaska here...
Brief AI Snideness
Again with the brevity. Of the brief variety.
Nothing to say about Kris, Scott, Anoop, Michael.
Matt=awesome.
Still not a fan of Lil. Boring.
Megan? Vote for the Worst is saving you. Don't feel good about it.
Still not on the Adam bandwagon, but that was really, really well done.
Danny. Flawless vocal, but I wanted me some "Grapevine."
Alison > Lil FTW
The obvious Bottom Three would be Megan, Michael, and Scott. Megan might get VFTW support, Michael might get Countrifried support, and Scott might draw votes from the He's-So-Inspirational crowd. Megan should be leaving us, but I'll go with Scott. My predictometer took a hit last week, so don't bet the farm on me.
AI Snideness: Oprytunities
It's Country Week. Wake me next week.
Michael (some Garth Brooks song with too many words - and notes) - The vocals resembled scat (the vocal improvisation technique, not bear feces), and I was actually more impressed by the harmonica guy.
Alison (another wordy song) - I missed most of it due to having to assure Ethan that, should his tooth fall out in the night, he'd be okay. Seemed pitchy in places, but still okay.
Kris (more Garth) - Controlled awesomeness. Really liked it. (maybe mostly because it didn't sound Country-ish)
Lil (a song I actually recognized) - Nothing particularly wrong, and better than I expected. I'm still not on the bandwagon, though.
Adam (Ring of Eastern Fire) - Amazing control. Mr. Cash pulled something turning over in his grave. But I was basically positive on the strangeness.
Scott (Martina I think?) - "Nice" vocals, but nothing to write home about. Big ups for the "we can move it closer!" comment.
Alexis (I knew the song again!)) - Left me a bit cold. And it seemed like it was all beginning and end with no middle.
Danny (Carrie song!) - Wow can he sing. But the first part was definitely the weak link.
Anoop (Willie!) - And he's back from being a comic book character to being a singer. Nicely done.
Megan (Oldie) - My whelm is way, way under at this point. Evidently she was sick, but the performance didn't match up to what little they showed us of her Randy session. I thought it would come off as WWII radio-style. Didn't.
Matt (more Carrie) - Whelm still under. I think I'd have liked a different key or something. Seemed a bit grindy. But the judges heard something else.
Tough to call the exodus this week. Maybe Vote for the Worst will come through for Megan, or she'll get a flu-sympathy vote, but I've got to believe she's in the Bottom Three. And I think Adam is very polarizing, so I'll put him there, too. And Allison, since she failed to make much of an impression on me. Although I could see Michael sliding down that way, too. One of the girls will take the train. Probably Megan. We'll see if my 100% accuracy holds this week. (hint: don't bet on it)
AI Briefs: Jackson Thirteen
I'll strive for brevity. Big-time brevity. I'm talking about major amounts of briefness.
First, Ryan's "interview" of the judges:
Randy: Sing good.
Kara: Umm...somebody might be on the radio. So I'd better be tougher.
Paula: Don't be intimidated by the stage.
Simon: What Paula said, except with British accent. Which makes it make more sense.
Michael Jackson's music is a huge range for the contestants to chose from, and I hope they choose well. But I think it'll be harder for the ladies to really handle the songs.
Lil, "The Way You Make Me Feel" - apart from a bit of gender confusion, a decent performance.
Scott, "Keep the Faith" - Easily his best performance, and there's still something of a George Michael tone in there. I just want it to come out more often.
Danny, "PYT" - Pwnd (see link for definition if you're a n00b).
Michael, "You Are Not Alone" - A decent performance of a truly lame song. Oh, and Paula's trying for multi-syllabic words again. Somebody stop her.
Jasmine, "I'll Be There" - Pretty decent Karaoke with a couple of very bad notes.
Kris, "Remember the Time" - Very cool. Kind of what Jason Castro would've done if he had the talent. Lost his way a bit toward the end though.
Alison, "Give in to Me" - Very unique and polished.
Anoop, "Beat It" - Lord help me, I agreed with Paula. He tread on iconic ground here. Fun, but not smart.
Jorge, "Never Can Say Goodbye" - Good vocals wasted on a very Lawrence Welk song.
Megan, "Rockin' Robin" - Does not compute.
Adam, "Black or White" - I'm not a fan, but he did his thing. Although the last note stunk.
Matt, "Human Nature" - Not much to say. Maybe a bit over the top in places, but I dug it.
Alexis, "Dirty Diana" - Smokin'.
Since two are taking the train this week, they'll probably go with a Bottom Four. Jasmine, Jorge, Megan, and Kris. Anoop will probably be safe. And who goes? Jasmine and Jorge, I think.
Wannabe Wednesday: AI8 Semis, Part I
First off, the AI producers need to sack whoever came up with the parents/loved ones in the green room thing. It's boring, and it's bad television. What, exactly, are we looking for from them?
As for the singers, I ask them, in the words of Crewman Guy from Galaxy Quest, "Did you guys ever watch the show?" Because some of these song choices were just unpardonable.
And now, random snark or praise:
Jackie - Freddy Mercury wants his pants back.
Rickey - Why haven't we seen him before?
Alexis - Good song choice, good vocal.
Brent - Boring countrified garbage.
Stevie - Buh-bye. Went for "young," came up with "eight-years-old and singing while jumping on her bed."
Anoop - Basically boring. But he'll make it through as a Wild Card if nothing else.
Casey - Altogether brutal.
Michael - I really like him, but the song didn't show off the smoothness I was looking for.
Anne Marie - Sounded a bit pageanty. Bad song choice.
Steven - Not a great performance. Yes, the song had the word "boogie" in it, and there's substantial mojo involved in that, but it wasn't enough.
Tatiana - I wrote down her name, and that's pretty much all I can bring myself to do.
Danny - I can't say I loved the song choice, but the vocal was stellar.
Predictions, you say? Danny and Alexis in a walk, and Anoop or She-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named-Twice as possible alternates. Oh, and there's just no way I'm watching it.